The Desperate Need to Rearrange

Hello, everyone. My name is Mel, and I am admitting to having a problem. I am a serial furniture rearranger.

There...it's out there. I have a need to rearrange furniture. When I was still living with my parents, and when I had more space than I do now, I had to rearrange the furniture every three months or so. I'm sure that I absolutely drove my parents crazy with it. They'd walk into my bedroom and I'll have managed to rotate the entire thing by myself.

I've lived in this house for just over two years, and haven't been able to figure out how to rotate the furniture because of the way that the rooms are laid out. I live in a Victorian two up-two down terrace, and in some areas modernisation has not been its friend. Don't get me wrong, it's a fantastic place, and perfect for just the Imp and I, but I can't move the furniture around. I have gas fires, an alcove with a cupboard built specifically to set a telly on, and a sofa that was gifted to us that only fits along one wall in the living room. The dining room is bigger than the living room, but I can't flip them because there's no place suitable for the telly.

Upstairs is a whole different story. We have a lot of heavy furniture. Some of it's ours, some of it belongs to the landlord. I have four bookcases in my bedroom, alone, that were taking up an entire wall. I have been agonising over this for a long time, because it's really been bothering me. As much as I adore my books, my bedroom just seemed consumed by them. I suffer from insomnia, then my sleep is rubbish, then I don't want to wake up in the morning.  The Imp's room was worse...she had three wardrobes and two bookcases, as well as a huge, dark set of drawers, her bed, a wooden doll's house, and the rest of her toys. She rarely actually played up there, and I couldn't figure out why because she still had loads of space (we both have nice sized double bedrooms).

I finally snapped on Monday. I've been slowly having a sort out for the past several months, being harsh with myself and getting rid of things that are just taking up precious space. I couldn't avoid it any more...I had to succumb to my desperate need to move furniture, and our bedrooms are the only place that it could happen. I helped the Imp put all of her toys into their laundry baskets, cleared the bookshelves off, then proceeded to rotate it all. She helped me pick bits up from my bedroom floor and shift books off and on the shelves. In her room, I shifted two bookcases, her bed, a doll's house, and two wardrobes. I added a wardrobe from my bedroom, and swapped her massive bureau with the smaller one from my room. In my room, I shifted four bookcases, a large dressing table, a big telly on a stand. my bed and the nightstand. Even though I've added another wardrobe to her room, the Imp's room feels a lot more spacious and balanced. Yesterday, I hardly saw her because she was actually playing up there...I was shocked, to say the least. Since Monday, she's actually kept her room tidy and helped me make her bed every morning.

The difference in the feel of my room is amazing. I've actually felt the need to go to bed at a decent hour...last night, I was up there within a half hour of tucking the Imp in. I didn't go to sleep straight away, but I relaxed quite nicely with my Kindle and the telly. I'm actually getting a little more rested with the sleep that I have, and I'm not struggling to wake up in the morning. The energy is actually feeling like it has a better balance.

I was chatting with Witchy Kitty yesterday, and the overall energy in my house has been feeling a lot better. Ever since I've moved in here, the house has had it's own special personality. Over the past year, it seemed to have changed, to almost being depressive. The house spirits haven't been very happy with me, and I wasn't seeing it. I was struggling with relations with my friends, my own stress, depression, and loneliness. I've finally managed to work my way out of my own personal funk, though, recently. I finally received the confirmations that my childcare will be funded for my return to college to do the course that I started last year.  I've made a definite decision as to what educational path I will be taking. My friends are coming around more often, and we're back to everybody not being so low. And I've made a definite decision to redecorate. The first of the paint will be brought around this weekend, so I can get a start on the living room and dining room, to be followed by the kitchen, bathroom, the Imp's room, and finally my room.

It's almost like the house is happier that I've made some decisions, and that I'm settling within myself. I've always had a deep desire to move about, but since moving into this house, I've felt like a real homebody. It's been a difficult thing to accept, I think. When I was looking at houses, I actually refused this one, because the rooms felt too small and the previous tenants smoked like chimneys. I have had a deep desire to move to the other side of the country to be closer to a friend, but this is the first place in either Indiana or England that has actually felt like my true home. I moved out of my parents' home when I was 20. Counting that move, I have moved around 16 times, including moving back in with my parents, and have been classed as homeless twice. I'll be 35 next month, and I now have a deep desire to stay put. I'd honestly like to be able to understand why it has taken this long for me to find 'home'. I used to want to travel all of the time, and now I rarely ever leave the city. My ideal holiday is going and spending time in Cardiff with my dear friend and her boys for a week.

I've managed to get the furniture shifting out of my system this week, and once I get it all painted, this house will be like new. I'll be restarting college in a week and a half, and I've got everything together and ready. I know where I'm going and what I want to do. I've fully recognised what I need and want mentally and emotionally, and, with the support of my family of friends, I'm almost ready to take the leap to find it.

Mel

Motivation and Organisation

To my closest friends, they know that I have my moments. I seem to be super organised, with everything all prepared ahead of time. Unfortunately I'm not always like that. I constantly have plans and ideas for improvement going through my head, but it doesn't always happen, or takes forever for me to get it actioned. I fully admit that I have issues with motivation. I naturally sit on the borderline of depression, as most of us do, and when I'm having a low time I don't want to do anything. I'm just not in the mood, and I don't see the point.

Unfortunately, being disorganised on the outside, i.e. my house being a bombsite, doesn't help my mental organisation. It probably doesn't help yours, either. Not being able to find anything drives me crazy. Everything piled up on the dining table, and around it, makes me feel like everything is starting to close me in. When everything is tidy, I find myself more motivated for having people around to visit, for working on projects that have been in the pipeline, and for celebrating my deities with rituals and card readings. I've now hit the bottom of my low, and I'm ready to climb back up and get myself sorted out again. For me, a tidy home is a happy home. Or, at least it's a happier me...the Imp doesn't care as long as she can get to her cars, books, and drawing materials.

I have a plan, and I have help. I may not agree with a lot of her views or ideas, but I do have to admit that Time Warp Wife has an excellent housekeeping schedule that appeals to my levels of organisation. It breaks down everything into individual and bite-sized segments that make keeping on top of things easier. I'm getting ready to print it myself, but just to warn you, it's six to seven pages. I'm going to stick those pages on the back of the kitchen door, to keep myself motivated, and to double check what needs to be done daily. She also has printable monthly calendars, if that makes any difference to you. One of the things about housework that really puts me off is that it can seem like a huge and overwhelming task, and being a single mum, I'm the only one that can do it. Don't get me wrong, the Imp does have her tasks, but sometimes she can be a right little hindrance with creating a tornado behind what I've already completed. The last time that I hoovered, she had stuff all over the floor within ten minutes.  At the moment, until the end of the school term in July, I have three hours while she's in nursery. So, that's about 2 1/2 hours of time at home that I can focus on getting sorted or working on projects.

But TWW breaks it down so it's not overwhelming. Her schedule is just focusing on basic housekeeping, not meal planning and personal care. There are specific tasks to be done every day...make your bed (seriously...this hardly takes any time), do at least one load of laundry, wash the dishes and make sure they're put away before you go to bed, tidy, dejunk, and have a journal.

For me, to make both mine and the Imp's beds takes about five minutes. That's not a big deal. Laundry, well, my biggest problem is that I need to fold and put things away. Laundry is regularly caught up, I'm just really bad about dumping it either in the dining room or my room.  Dishes are another problem area for me, so I need to get that in hand. It maybe takes me twenty minutes, so when I view it that way I need to suck it up.

Tidying won't be an issue once I take the time to get it to rights in the first place. That's tied in with my dejunking. Before my parents visiting, I managed to get rid of a lot of things. I had to be quite harsh with myself. When was the last time that I fit in those trousers? Five years ago? Ok, in the lifetime that I'm that size again, they will be extremely out of fashion, so I need to get rid of them. Do I really need that item that I haven't touched in a year or two? Is it something that I really need to keep around? Does a friend have one that I might be able to briefly borrow when I actually do need it?  I still have a lot that needs to be dejunked because I'm an admitted packrat. One item that I'm seriously contemplating about, at the moment, is my dining room table. I think I'm the only one of my friends that has one, and it hardly gets used. The only time that it is used is when everybody is around for a proper meal, and that doesn't happen often. I'm thinking about getting rid of the dining table because it takes up so much space and is a target for junk to pile up. The Imp and I use padded trays to eat off of in the living room, and I could feasibly get some more for when guests come around. The Imp has pretty good table manners, for a 3 1/2 year old, when we're out in public, and just the two of us sitting at a table that seats six just feels cold and impersonal. Getting rid of the table will give her more space to play, and maybe allow me to create an organised space for my craft supplies (which are currently stuffed and scattered all over the house, and I can never find what I want).

As for keeping a journal, that's why I've started this blog :P

I do try to encourage the Imp to help, but she sometimes has the attention span of a goldfish, as most three year olds do. But she has jobs that she's started on her own, and I encourage them strongly. She fills the cat food bowls when she gets home from nursery. When reminded, she puts her dirty washing in the basket in the bathroom. I have some of the clothes line strung at her height, so she pegs out all of our knickers, socks, and some of her clothes (I just don't look at it, because it's not like how I do it. She is trying, so I must keep my OCD to myself). When we've been shopping, she puts the fruit and veg away, and most of the items that go into the refrigerator. She helps me tidy her toys away. When it's time to make dinner, she helps by bringing onions, potatoes, and anything out of the fridge. It may be little things, but those little things can make a huge difference, and has helped with her communication and vocabulary skills. When she was going to speech therapy, they couldn't figure out why she wasn't using normal, kiddy basic words until they realised that she knew more cooking words than anything else...at two, she could point out mushrooms, garlic, onions, and lots of other veg. And those words were all clear. One of the speech therapists' thoughts were 'what child knows what garlic is?!?'. Well, that would happen to be my child. Being gluten free, having to cook everything from scratch, and having to have her in the kitchen so I can keep an eye on her, well, she's going to learn by example.

One of my personal tips is to make the time to plan your shopping. Most of the time, I do my main shopping for a month. Because I don't drive, I try to plan it in time to have it delivered...for the main shop that I use, Tuesday and Wednesday are their cheap delivery days, and the cost of delivery is the same as me buying a Dayrider bus ticket. I start off by making a written list of what I'm going to need for the month. I then input it into a price comparison site. My site of choice is mysupermarket.co.uk.  Something that I've realised is that not all of the offers are on there, so, once it shows me which shop will be cheaper, I go to that shop's proper website to double check all of the offers and finalise my shop and delivery. It may seem convoluted and awkward, but I save anywhere from £10 to £30 by doing this. I try to do it so that over the remainder of the month I only really need to get fresh fruit and veg. Some people would say milk, but the Imp has goats milk, and we get it in the UHT boxes.

I know full well that I will feel much better once my house is back to rights, and now I've just about got the motivation to do it. Once my kitchen is back to rights, I'll be more motivated to get back to creative cooking, and making our own treats, which I haven't been in the mood for. Once I get everything else sorted, I won't feel so guilty when I stop to work on crafts or read my Kindle. I'll also be clearer to write the ritual that I desire to write for Lughnassahd, and maybe plan a feast for that and other upcoming celebrations.

Mel