Happy 2012!

As per when I hit my college restart, it's been a while since I've last posted. It's just been so busy for us for the holidays, which turned out to be some of the best that I've had, barring the fact that I'm still trying to dig my house and kitchen out. I'd much rather spend time with my family and friends, as we all would. I have tomorrow to do it before starting the new term at college. I thought today, being a new start, I should use this space to recap the year, and to put down some pseudo-resolutions.

Recap of 2011

This has probably been the year that I have seen the most positivity that I can ever think of having. I've experienced the strengthening of friendships, renewal of old friendships, and the gaining of new friendships. This is the year that I've finally gotten brave enough to truly put myself out there, and starting this blog has made the biggest difference to me. For those that are interested in going back to my start, just follow this link.

After the downer of having to drop my college Access course in March, I restarted it again in September. It was a bit of a struggle to fit in with the new group to start with, but now I can say that I've got friends amongst them that I plan on keeping for a lifetime. I'm extremely pleased and surprised with my progress on the course. They started with a new awarding body, which makes things a little more complicated, but I feel that I'm doing a lot better than I was last year, and it feels more like I'm getting somewhere than I was last year.

I've seen a lot of changes with the Imp. We were struggling with our relationship at the beginning of the year, but she then started at an excellent nursery in May, and us having our separate time has made the hugest difference to the both of us. I have my own identity back, and my life is no longer revolving around her every move, and her personality and skills have taken dramatic leaps and grow with each day. She started there with being six months behind in her speech, and after a fortnight there, the switch finally flicked and she was speaking in complete and clear sentences. She skipped a few steps. She now makes her opinion clear, and, most of the time, when her emotions aren't getting in the way, let's me know what she wants and needs. She's become very independent, and it makes it a lot easier for us to be equals within our little family unit.

Seeing my mom, stepdad, and one of my three brothers back in May was a truly special time. I hadn't seen them since 2003, and being able to spend a fortnight with them and my now-10 year old niece that I met for the first time was amazing.

There has been the sadness, as well, with the loss of a yearmate in the beginning of the year, and the loss of friends' pets that meant a lot to me. I have had my down moments, but they've been a lot quicker to get out of than they have been in the past.

Pseudo Resolutions for 2012

I'm not in to making resolutions, because they're too easy to break. But there are a few goals that I truly want to put in place.  From the way that I'm looking at it, 2012 looks to be truly spectacular for me. It may not seem like much to some people, but that is the word that has been shouting at me, because I am truly looking forward with a lot of positivity.

• Spend more time with my friends, aka My English Family
• I've spent more time than ever with my friends this year, which has made a huge difference to me, but I think we need to do even more. My closest friends I have dubbed as my honorary siblings, so, if you look at it that way, as well as having three blood-related brothers, I also have four sisters, three brothers, the Imp's Grumpy, and the keeper of my heart. Hmm, because I'm likely to be blogging more about them, I should probably come up with alternative names for them all. You've already seen me regularly post about one, Witchy Kitty. She's changing to a new blog, but I think she can keep her same name with me :P I'll come up with names for everybody else as I go along.
• Get out of Lincoln more often. 
• I rarely leave the city. I think I can maybe think of three to five trips out for the day in the last year. I'm already planning a trip to Cardiff to visit Illustratedmum (Welshy sister), which I really should do more often.  More day trips are in the pipelines, as well as some potential weekends away.
• Finish my Access course and start University
• That's all dependent on me getting accepted to uni.  My UCAS will definitely be going out tomorrow, and I need to keep up on my course work. 
• Keep up on my blogging.
• This blog has made a huge difference to me, so I need to focus back down and post more often again. Maybe make a goal for at least once a week or fortnight, minimum, to get me back on track.
• Read more books
• I'm normally an avid reader, but I've just not had the mental focus to concentrate and read, so my stack is building up. I must try harder. 
• Do more crafting.
• I've put my cross stitch aside for the time being, because I really need to find a floor stand for my frame. I've opted for some smaller crochet projects that I can get the sense of accomplishment of actually finishing something. For holiday gifts, I managed to whip through and complete three scarves. That's a huge accomplishment for me, the way that things have been so busy. One of them was even finished in a day...that was only due to me reinjuring myself and having to force myself to actually sit down and stop. The other two took me a fair bit longer, but I still managed to finish one for Yule and one for Christmas, and I was quite pleased with myself.  One of my posts to look back on regarding projects would be this one. Another project that looks easy is from Kirsty Alsopp's program on Channel 4. She did a heart garland for across her mantle for Christmas, but it's inspired me to attempt to do something similar for each Sabbat to go across my shelf in the living room. I just need to find fabric that I fancy, and the time.
• Concentrate more on my rituals and celebrations.
• I don't mean doing anything fancy, but, as seemingly seems to be a repeating theme, I need to take more time to stop and celebrate. It's not that I don't celebrate with a thought or few every day, but I need to stop more. Nothing organised...we all know that I don't play all that well with others that try to be organised, but I feel the need to do some energy and spiritual work with others (just as long as it's not organised. Got to make that clear :P )
• Project 365
• I'm a rather snap-happy person with my mobile, so I've finally brought up the courage to start a Project365. Feel free to follow me, if you're interested, on silverswan365.blogspot.com

Again, those are just a few goals, but nothing is set in stone. I really can't call them resolutions for the year, because they're ongoing things in my life that I'm looking forward.

I hope that all of you will be having as spectacular of a 2012 as I anticipate mine to be. Feel free to share yours in the comments, because I love seeing what everybody is looking forward to.

Mel

Joy Pockets (300811)

OK, I am a day late, but I was sidetracked last night with snuggling with Witchy Kitty's Cub. For being a stay at home mum, I feel like I've been super busy lately, but I struggle to figure out why. But, here are my Joy Pockets for the past week (don't forget to check them out at Bohemian Twilight).

• Still having Yule and Christmas on the brain, I was rather pleased with myself for coming up with the perfect gift ideas for the Imp's grandparents...all handmade and within my pathetic budget. I've felt bad for the past several years that I haven't been able to send anything at all to my family, and to find something perfect is exceptional.
• Having fantastic neighbours. I have one neighbour that takes my bins out every week because I'm dreadful at waking up on Monday morning. Yesterday, the neighbour behind me made an exuberant search and managed to capture one of my delinquent quails that boldly jumped out of the hutch while I was sorting them out and made a mad dash for it. She was found, safe and sound, next to his bins after a half hour/45 minutes.
• A girly night that didn't wind down until 2am. It was a fantastic Friday night.
• Sharing a meal with friends, and my attempts at gluten free chicken gravy turning out amazing on top of cheesy mashed potatoes and stir fried chicken and red onion.
• Waking up for one of my normal stirrings to find both cats in bed with me. Loki has always slept with me, and was by my hand. I moved my foot to find that I kicked Florence and she didn't shift. Florence joined us in December of last year, and she's never slept with me before...she normally sleeps on the Welsh dresser downstairs. She's been extremely cuddly since the rearrangement of my bedroom.
• My family in Maryland and North Carolina being safe and sound after the hurricane. My cousin and his wife lost a few roof tiles, and my brother lost a couple of trees...one that missed the house and landed in the woods instead.

So, what has brought joy and a smile to your face this week?

Mel

Cartoon Giggles

We watch a lot of cartoons. Part of it is that if the Imp is watching the telly, I tend to be watching it with her. The other part is that I admit to still having part of me that's a big kid. I do limit the cartoon watching, though, because too much "Mickey Mouse Clubhouse" melts my brain cells. I can say that at least most of what she watches is educational, but, you know what? Sometimes we need to watch cartoons that make us giggle. 

I find that, nowadays, almost all of the cartoons that are aimed at the Imp's age groups is a constant onslaught of educational items...counting, colours, morals, etc. It is a fantastic thing, but sometimes a kid just has to be able to stop and watch something that they don't have to think about...to be able to watch it for fun. I introduced the Imp to Looney Tunes this week, and I don't think I've ever heard her giggle at something like she did while watching the Road Runner and Wyle E. Coyote. And when Wyle E. Coyote fell, she was gasping in shock, and saying "oh no!" until she realised that he was ok. She also loves to watch classic Batman, with Adam West, where she comments "They're really silly, mummy."

I've been thinking about this, comparing cartoons that are aimed at the Imp today to cartoons that were aimed at me when I was in her age bracket. Unless we watched PBS for Sesame Street and 321 Contact, the cartoons were just to make us laugh. Some of the early cartoons during the week were mixed in with Cowboy Bob, who taught us our morals like how to be nice. But it wasn't non-stop education like what the Imp is presented with now. It shouldn't have to be...they need to have a break from it, time to be a child and have a giggle. The classic cartoons also taught us a range of emotions, that not everything is fluffy and bright all of the time. Take Wyle E. Coyote, as an example. He shows a range of emotions through all of his segments. Joy at when he thinks he's found the perfect solution to catching the Roadrunner. Frustration when it doesn't work, and persistence to keep on trying. That range is missing in a lot of the modern cartoons. 

The Imp and I don't just watch cartoons, either. When she is up, I make sure that things aren't definitely for adults, but we watch a wide range of programs together. Star Trek and Star Wars, Doctor Who, Britain's and America's Got Talent (she actually tries to dance along), Music Videos, etc. A year ago, I was actually told off because we watch the news every day. Seriously?!? So many children are sheltered nowadays, they don't know what the real world is like. We don't watch much of the national news, but we mainly watch the local news, which isn't as harsh as the national news. I've even gotten the occasional idea of a day out for us by watching the local news. 

The point is that we watch it together, and we talk about what's going on. We sing along to theme tunes and music videos. When we watch the educational cartoons, the Imp counts along, and shouts out the shapes or colours that they're looking for, and we chat about what is going on. When we watch anything else, we chat about what's going on as well, and giggle together. In the process, she learns that she can giggle, but that not everything is all fluffy, sugary nice, and cutesy.

Mel

Family Chores

Like everybody else, I dread housework. I even admit to procrastination. I have been doing a lot better about it, but I still have my off days. While we had a few hot days, my kitchen built up a bit because it was too hot and humid for me to stand there. Ok, I know it wasn't as hot here in England as it has been in the States lately, or for as long, but I detest the heat. A beach holiday is my idea of a nightmare.

Since it's been a rainy day today, with a cooler temperature, I couldn't procrastinate on the dishes any more. I didn't realise that I would have assistance, though. The Imp, at 3 1/2, decided that she wanted to help, so grabbed her own tea towel and started drying cutlery and putting it away in the drawer. She didn't ask if I wanted help, she just cracked on with it, happily singing her little head off.  One thing that it made it me realise is that I need to start cleaning the floor first instead of last, because I caught her spreading the tea towel on the floor, stacking in a pile of utensils, rolling them up, and then carrying it all over to the drawer in a bundle.

It also made me realise how fantastic it is that the Imp and I work so well together as a team. It's just us, and I'm so used to watching parents struggle with their toddlers, especially in the 'terrible twos' and, a term that some of my friends have used, 'Threenager'. Don't get me wrong, we both have our off days, and we're both argumentative, stubborn mules. But we can, and do, work together to keep the house up now. She's fairly reasonable about tidying her toys up (at least downstairs...her bedroom is a bombsite, but I don't care as long as I have a path to her bed).

Sometimes I'll get frustrated at her, but I do get down and help her if she's struggling to get started. That's the whole point...I help her, but I don't do it all. It wouldn't be fair for me to expect her to be able to cope with all of it, and it wouldn't be fair for her to expect me to be her maid. It's all about letting her join in and think it's all her idea. There are certain chores that I ask her specifically to do, like keep her downstairs toys in a reasonable array, and to put them away before bedtime (though I forgot to remind her this evening, so they're all still sitting in the living room). She's responsible for putting her overnight nappy in the bucket in the morning...I don't have to ask on this one. She puts all her dirty clothes in the basket in the bathroom, helps me load the washing machine, and she pegs all our underpants on the lowest part of the outside washing line. But all of it she started on her own. I just have to ask her if she wants to help...sometimes I don't even have to ask, she pushes her way in.

Our team work has panicked people in the past. The Imp has joined me in the kitchen from the start. She spent a lot of her infancy in a sling, watching me cook. Now, the moment that I step into the kitchen, she's up on her step right next to me. A year ago I didn't get the big knife far enough back on the counter, and I walked in to find her with a potato on the chopping board, cutting it into slivers that she said were chips, and putting them in the roasting tin. She hasn't touched the knife since, but she watches me like a hawk with my every movement, and comments (nags at me) on making sure to keep my fingers back because the knife is sharp. When I have the oven door swung open, she stops where she is, or backs away, until I have it shut. All I have to do is tell her I'm opening the 'hot hot'. She's in charge of the vegetable cupboard and refrigerator, including when putting shopping away. I'm not even allowed to touch the fridge. I'd hate to think what it looks like, but she knows where everything is. Her first real words were all regarding cooking and veg.

I see a lot of parents, even of teenagers, that wait on their kids hand and foot. Ok, whatever floats your boat. But I feel that with the Imp learning things young, and learning how to work as a team within a functioning family unit, she'll have a stronger upbringing. I can hope that as an adult, she won't dread the necessary evils of having to do housework. I'm trying to improve my procrastination, so she sees me getting what I don't like to do done before what I enjoy doing. It's a struggle at the moment, but I do promise that I'm improving. Since ditching the dining room table, we're finding the living room and dining room easier to keep up, so it doesn't take us as long to tidy up. It's even quicker with both of us doing it, and more enjoyable. She actually lifts my mood up, because her random singing under her breath is almost constant, really cute, and makes me laugh.

Mel

Zombie Apocalypse? What About the Lost Skills?

Today I finally decided to catch up on my budget spreadsheets. I've been horrible for the past couple of months about keeping it up to date, but because I'm on a fixed income I have to watch every penny and it stresses me out more to not remember exactly what has gone in or out, or how much I will have to survive to the end of the month. So, I cracked the mental whip and balanced it all out. That's after spending all afternoon trying to figure out where £50 went (I forgot to enter a bill that had been paid....oops).

This got me thinking about some of the recent things on the 'end of the world'. From tv series such as 'The Walking Dead' to the current news headlines of the guy who predicted the apocalypse, it's something that you get the range of people...from those who don't give a flying flip to those that are already hiding in their fallout shelters.

I personally don't think that it will be zombies or anything like that. No, I feel like it will be from people taking each other out and destroying the technology, utilities, and supply chains to try to punish each other. Those caught in the crossfire will have to relearn how to survive. A lot of the traditional skills have been lost to all but a very few people. Unless people group off with at least one person who knows how to live off the land, there would be a lot of people starving because they wouldn't be able to feed themselves.  Freezing because they don't know how to build a fire. I think that it has been forgotten how to even rely on other people, to share skills.

I actually think that I'd be happier with a simpler world. Ok, so lack of fancy communications systems would be a bit heartbreaking. I admit to my mobile being borderline surgically attached to my hand (especially the new one), and Skype, Facebook, and Twitter allow me to keep in contact with my family in Indiana and Missouri. But life would go back to being simpler. Eat, sleep, protect, and provide for you and your family. But it's not monetary providing. It's identifying your food sources and knowing how to obtain and prepare them safely. There are adults in this world that I doubt would survive without the local takeaway.  It's knowing how to sew clothing and necessities.  I don't do anything fancy, but I can hand sew and I know how to use my sewing machine without electricity (my first sewing machine when I moved to the UK was an 1868 hand-cranked Singer).

I'd like to think that my friends that live nearby would join up with us, so we could share skills, take care, and protect each other.  They are my non-blood family, and I rely so much on them even now.

Ok. so nothing like another of my random posts.  I probably shouldn't have fretted so much over my spreadsheets, knowing that it would have worked it's way out. I seriously am not frivolous with spending...not even close to it, because I can't be. There are things that I want, but that gets put aside for what we need. I've now fully admonished myself for not keeping up on my spreadsheet, because I stress less when I've got it up to date and easily accessed.

Mel